If love is a wonderful feeling, married life is not necessarily an easy task! Between friction and misunderstandings, it is questionable whether Men and women are made to live together! And if the key to happiness was to stop wanting to change any price other to accept it as it is?
In less than half a century, the female and male models have changed dramatically. Many aspects of man and woman now tend to resemble more and more, erasing the specificities. However, according to John Gray, author of "Men Are from Mars, Women are from Venus" *, it would be the essential cause of the failure of current relationships. Thus it would be preferable to accept the other as he is absolutely rather than trying to change it. This condition is indispensable for the couple to "hold water". So should you stop expecting the impossible?
Aliens for each other ...
For John Gray, the difference between men and women would be as radical as they were from two outer planets: their ways to communicate, act, feel, think and love are completely different. Men advocate the effectiveness, success, autonomy, power and would be more interested in the objectives and results by the relationships and people. For women that matters, it would be the exchange, feelings, self-giving, intimacy.
emotional needs of different basic
Based on his 20 years experience in couples therapy, John Gray draws up a list of priorities emotional men and women engaged in a romantic relationship. In other words, it defines what they absolutely need to feel loved and fulfilled in their relationship. According to him, women would wait until all of the attention, listening, understanding, respect, dedication, recognition and acceptance their feelings (their changing moods, too). Men, for their part, would require first of all admiration, approval, trust and be appreciated as they are (unless one seeks to change them).
Suffice to say that the face of such differences and misunderstandings and conflicts are endless. The disagreements are inevitable if everyone expects the other he has the interests and behavior identical to his love! Developing together ...
Rediscovering that we are radically different and take into account everyone's needs are therefore the first step to has a chance of torque. Understand and accept the spouse avoids accumulating frustrations, resentments, disappointments for all what is expected and who does not (as desired). Moreover, this understanding can offer the other what they really need.
Only once this settled understanding that the couple can go forward. Men and women are ready to evolve and make minor concessions indispensable to the development of a satisfactory relationship strong enough to take in the weather. So let
to show openness, tolerance, respect ... These qualities will help you in your relationship, but also in your life in general!
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