between advocates of "stay at home" and those who dream only a mild joint home, the Sparks Fly! But living together is that the decision is vital to a real relationship, or conversely, a true "kills-love"?
Living together out of the question!
"I refuse to share my living space," "I need my freedom," some couples refuse cohabitation systematic and the two partners live their separate ways, only found a few days a week. If
is generally a deliberate choice, it can also be a forced decision (job transfer, etc.), while often painful qu'épanouissante, but limited in time. Some people choose to live separately, for fear of commitment, but little by little, settled in one or the other, the air of nothing ...
Looks like a couple ... But can
we build a solid relationship when you do share a few nights a week? If this seems possible in some love (A minority), according to experts, we can not talk while torque itself. That is what we call "the wedding weekend, the two partners are not finding that to share fun activities, said Robert Neuburger, a psychiatrist and therapist for couples and families. But this formula is often to couples who are not already. " Difficult, it seems, not to share the daily, small joys and great sorrows, days of fatigue or illness, invoices and management of common nest! These couples say they live the best, without knowing the downside. But in fact, they often idealize the relationship, and, like the beginning of a meeting, play a role, hide their faults and weaknesses just to show them a picture perfect and smooth ... that is only part of their personality.
A story ended before it began
Moreover, it is wrong to believe that love part time avoids the problems. "The difficulty is sometimes the lack of sharing, lack of privacy that are markers of a common territory or shared finances," says R. Neuburger. Common life is reduced to the emotional and sexual life. This solution sometimes adopted to avoid problems of a separation, a problem in the construction of the couple because the separation is so early that it is sometimes necessary ... to the extent that the couple is virtually no!
The uncertainties of married life
Yet, though living in a whole seems essential for most couples, the daily double is far from smooth sailing! "Difficulties are related to the relationship between the spaces of individual privacy and intimacy of the couple, said R. Neuburger. Those who have long lived alone before settling down, finding it painful sensations Invasiveness their privacy. There must be room to another, where he managed very well by itself, transform an area that we belonged exclusively condominiums.
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